About Attracting Hummingbirds?

I've spent more than a couple of years trying to get hummingbirds, yes I'm talking about hummingbirds, to come to the feeder we have at our house!

I've mixed sugar water in various concentrations, that didn't work! I purchased premixed nectar and that didn't work. About the only thing I haven't tried is decoys.

I'm sure everyone has seen those wooden duck decoys that hunters put in lakes or ponds to attract ducks to the water so they can shoot the crap out of them, or at least shoot the crap out of the sky trying to hit one as they fly away. One has to wonder what a duck or goose is thinking before it lands on the lake or pond. I mean is it like, 'hey guys look at all those funny looking ducks floating around down there on that water, let's go see what all the excitement is about!'

I find myself kind of hoping that the ducks are actually thinking, hey those dumb ass duck hunters put those stupid wooden birds in the water down there, let's go play chicken (I'm sure playing chicken is some kind of duck joke). After they have landed and the hunters have shot the crap out of everything but duck, with any luck, the ducks probably fly off laughing. It's either laughing or cursing poor Donald's bad luck in flying in front of a blast pointed at the sky.

Anyway, I digress. So I wonder if a hummingbird decoy carved out of wood would work in the same way?  First, I doubt any of the duck decoy makers actually make hummingbird decoys so you would have to carve it and paint it yourself.

Once you are done creating the little hummer decoy you could attach it to your hummingbird feeder to make the decoy look like it was sucking delicious nectar out of one of the feeding ports (or whatever you call those little holes), and before you know it you would have hundreds of those little suckers well, sucking at your feeder!

Now for the avid bird hunter this would not be the time to start blasting away at the hummingbirds! For one thing they are far to small to make a meal of, for another, you'd probably miss and hit the feeder which means you would have to go get a new one and carve another little hummingbird decoy which by now wouldn't fool any of those hummingbirds and which would just make you the laughing stock of the neighborhood. Besides, you don't want a bunch of hummingbirds flying around spreading the word that there is some dumb ass hummingbird hunter putting strange looking wooden hummer decoys on his feeder. The next thing you'd know there would be a bunch of hummingbirds around your house wanting to play a game of crow. Then, before you can say pigeon there's a bunch of guys building scarecrows around the neighborhood, it just never ends, trust me, I know...

Or Want To Ask One?

Well? Does anyone have any questions? You ask, I'll answer! There are no guarantees I'll be correct or that you will get the answer you want but with some 500 of you reading this blog at least one of you must have something your wondering about! Go ahead and give it a try, I'm the only one of us who should be, and most likely will be, embarrassed with the content of a response, mostly due to the fact that there are often times that I do not have the slightest idea what I'm talking about (like right now for instance) so if you ask a question I can guarantee you'll get an answer, I just can't guarantee it will make any sense.

By the way, this is not an 'I don't know what to write about so I'll write about nothing' post. I have thousands of ideas on what to write about and this just popped (not to be confused with pooped) into my head, so for any of you out there who are thinking I am just being lazy well, HA! This is not laziness, it may be stupidity depending on the number of questions I do or do not get, but it is not laziness.

So for all you people all over the world who need to relax, laugh, get something off your shoulders, or whatever, go ahead and try it; does anyone have any questions?